Babysitter meet-and-greet: questions to ask parents, and red flags
A meet-and-greet is the short visit before the first sit where the babysitter and the parents check each other out. These are the questions worth asking, grouped so you can tick them off, and a list of red flags that are about safety and payment only. A family's religion, background or income is never a red flag.
Routines
What does a normal evening (or afternoon) look like, hour by hour?
Meals and snacks: when, what, and anything they must not eat?
Naps and bedtime: what time, and what helps each child settle (a song, a light, a toy)?
Bath, teeth, homework: which of these do you want done, and how?
Discipline and behavior
When a child does not listen, what do you do, and what would you like me to do?
Is there anything I should never do (take away a toy, time-outs, raise my voice)?
What usually upsets each child, and what calms them down?
Screens and photos
Which shows, games and apps are allowed, and for how long?
Any screens before bed or at meals?
May I text you photos during the sit? (I never post children's photos unless you agree in writing.)
Allergies, medications and health
Any allergies (food, insect stings, medicine)? How severe, and what does a reaction look like?
Where is the EpiPen, inhaler or other medicine, and when is it used?
Any medication during the sit: name, dose, time, and written instructions?
Any conditions I should know about (asthma, seizures, diabetes) and the plan for each?
Where is the first-aid kit? May I give over-the-counter medicine, and which?
Emergencies
How do I reach you during the sit, and how fast will you answer?
Who is the backup contact if I cannot reach you?
Pediatrician's name and number, and which hospital you prefer?
The home address to give 911, the exits, smoke alarms and fire extinguisher?
Will you sign a note letting me get emergency treatment if you cannot be reached? (The info sheet has a template.)
Pick-up and other people
Who else may pick up the kids? Should I ask them for ID?
Is there anyone who may not pick them up, or a custody arrangement I should know about?
Will any other adults be home during the sit? Are visitors or friends' kids allowed?
Pets
What pets do you have, are they friendly with new people, and do they need feeding?
Anything the kids should not do with the pets?
House rules
Any rooms, yard areas or a pool that are off-limits?
May the kids play outside or go to the park? Doors locked, alarm on?
May I use the stove or oven? What food may I have?
Driving
Will I drive the kids anywhere? If so, whose car, and are the right car seats or boosters installed?
Pay and booking
My rate, how you will pay (cash, Venmo, Zelle) and when: at the end of each sit?
Cancellation and late-return terms, and how far ahead you usually book?
Red flags: safety
Will not give an emergency contact or a way to reach them during the sit.If a child is hurt or sick you need a parent or a backup adult within minutes.
Will not tell you about allergies, medications or medical needs.You cannot keep a child safe from a reaction you were never told about.
Asks you to drive the kids without a proper car seat or booster.Every US state requires child restraints for young children in cars; it is your licence and their safety.
Refuses a meet-and-greet or to let you see the home before the first sit.Meeting first is how both sides check each other; a family that will not is a family you know nothing about.
Will not say who may pick up the children, or you learn of a custody order only by accident.Handing a child to the wrong adult is the one mistake you cannot undo.
Other adults will be in the home during the sit and the parents will not say who.You should know who else is in the house before you agree to be there.
A hazard they will not address: an unlocked firearm, an unfenced pool, an aggressive dog.Ask for it to be locked, fenced or put away while you are there; decline if they refuse.
More children than agreed, or other families' kids added without asking.Your limit on children is a safety limit as much as a price.
Red flags: payment
Wants to pay "later" with no date.Agree when you are paid before the first sit; the end of each sit is the usual answer.
Will not agree a rate or cancellation terms before the first sit.Terms agreed afterwards are terms you were not able to say no to.
Sends more than the agreed amount and asks you to send the difference back.The US Federal Trade Commission describes this as a fake-check scam (consumer.ftc.gov/articles/fake-checks).
Asks you to pay anything up front (a "background check fee", supplies, a deposit) to get the job.The FTC lists paying to get a job as a sign of a job scam (consumer.ftc.gov/articles/job-scams).
Still owes you for an earlier sit.Settle what is owed before you book the next sit.
One red flag is a question to ask, not a verdict. Two, or one the family will not discuss, is a good reason to decline politely.
Open the Babysitting Business Kit: it sends each family a one-time info sheet (kids, allergies, medications, bedtimes, emergency contacts, doctor) that fills in their record, and shows which channel (church, school, Nextdoor, referrals, your website) brings the families who book.